Estimated reading time — 11 minutes

I started playing VRChat about two months ago. I picked it up out of desperation; I had lost a good friend a few weeks prior and needed to be around people, but had no one in my life at the time. He had been my only friend, and for years at that. I’d always been too socially awkward to talk to, and get to know people.

If you’ve played VRChat before, it went how you’d expect. I would join public worlds and group instances, be too shy to make conversation and end up leaving after an hour of feeling left out. Most people would try once and stop, but I… I was desperate. I tried again the next day. Then the next, and the next. After four consecutive days of playing with no luck I decided to put on a neutral looking avatar, walk up to a group, and just stand there until they talked to me. Fortunately for me, it worked. They took some kind of pity on me and taught me how to fit in, how to play, how to find avatars, and to be more comfortable around people. For the first time in years, I felt like maybe, just maybe, I could make friends.

I eventually did make friends. They’re good people. We would world hop, hang out, and drink together.
I became addicted to VRChat. It’s not that big of a deal. I was happy, and everything was fine, until about a week ago. You see, one week ago, I made a big mistake, though unknowingly. I felt a little down, and decided to go world hopping to look for a world that fit my mood, one that would let me get in touch with my emotions. I used the keyword “Dark” for my search, thinking that I might stumble upon something serene yet moody. That’s when I discovered “Dark Forest Clearing.” As far as I know, it no longer exists.
I will still find poorly made copies of it occasionally, but not the original. I don’t remember the author’s name, I didn’t think to check it. I never do. The thumbnail of the world was monotone and depicted a dense network of tall pine trees, all of them scalped and black. A thick light grey fog surrounded the base of each tree, letting through only a miniscule amount of detail, and in the center, on the ground, was a narrow and dark path, fading into the fog, contrasted by the otherwise grey, flat ground. The picture was taken a short distance above the ground, tilting slightly upwards. From what little was visible of the sky, it was possible to make out dark grey clouds. The world looked depressing overall. It was just what I needed. Solitude, a place within a calm yet obscured forest to rest and think for a while. I didn’t need nor want to see a beautiful sky, I needed peace of mind. A monotone world to fit my monotone thoughts.

There was no group or public instance open. The world was completely empty. In fact, it showed a total player count of 0. I pre-loaded the world while looking through my Spotify, noticing that it was only 23MB in size. It finished rather quickly. I put on my playlist; a mix of classical songs composed in a minor key, RHCP, and bittersweet sounding songs, and created an invite-only instance.
Upon joining the world I spawned on a dark circular path, and a subtle wind sound started playing.
The trees opened up in front of me, making way for the path which, after going forwards for a short distance, diverged into two; with one path going left and the other to the right. Three crows cawed and flew from the left to the right. I spun around and found an old wooden table behind me. On it was a note and an unlit red candle.
The note read: “A choice lies before you. To find what you seek, you must light the candle and make the right choice. Knock thrice, uncover the lies, but beware. Danger lies ahead.”
I stood there for a bit. Had I just unknowingly entered a puzzle or exploration world?
Maybe the world hadn’t been what I was looking for after all. I opened up the menu and checked the description for the world. It was empty. I exited out of the menu and read the note again.
It didn’t even rhyme, but I might as well play along. Sometimes worlds like this have hang-out spots.
If this one did, it would still be perfect for me, and once I felt better I could keep my mind occupied for a bit. I looked over the note one more time, attempting to commit its contents to my memory.
I noticed the word “right” was a different color, and the crows at the start had flown to the right. Maybe that was the author’s way to hint that the path going to the right was the correct path? I turned back around and started down the path.

The path, although straight at first, became unpredictable, winding, and even narrower the further I went. After walking for about 30 seconds, the path became narrow and faded to the point where it was impossible for me to tell whether or not I was even following it anymore. Instead of following the path itself, I tried to follow the gaps between the trees. It seemed to work for a while, but eventually I ended up at a dead end. I stopped. The wind was still howling, creating a noise not too different from a strong draft in a house. I turned around, feeling a black void spontaneously appear, and grow within my chest.
I did my best to head back the way I came. I walked for 30 odd seconds. Nothing. I kept walking. The atmosphere creeped into my mind, causing me to hesitate for a moment. My room was cold, I felt the void consuming me. I felt… scared. I opened up the menu again, and tried to go home. The game wouldn’t fade out. I exited the menu and kept walking. I heard the ground moving. Footsteps. Had they always been that loud? Were the footsteps even mine..? I opened the menu and tried to go to my home world again. Nothing. The footsteps grew louder, but… I was standing still. I exited the menu and kept walking. The footsteps grew louder. They were behind me now. I heard what sounded like quiet sobbing. I freaked out, lifted my headset and held the power button, turning it off. It made the shutdown noise and I breathed a sigh of relief.

I sat there for a moment before realizing that I had discovered a horror puzzle world. Great, just what I needed. I equated the inability to go to my home world to me panicking and missing the button twice, and decided to listen to my playlist in my bed.

Later that night I hopped on again to hang out with a friend. Nothing seemed off, at first.
We world-hopped for a bit and joined public lobbies, eventually settling on a private group instance in a hang-out world taking place on a rooftop of a big white building. We relaxed, talked to people, told stories, and had an overall great time. That is, until I saw him. He stood out like a sore thumb, how could he not?
A person using a monotone avatar depicting a tall man in a black trenchcoat with a glowing white face was standing in the distance, partially covered by a planter. The avatar had an open mouth, showing a rectangular black square, and its eyes were wide, always staring. Staring at me. I couldn’t make out any more details, he was too far away. I conversed with my friend for a bit before eventually telling her that he had been staring at me. She looked around before fixing her gaze toward the planter, and went quiet. “Let’s move to a different spot,” she mumbled. I didn’t argue. It’s not unusual for someone to stare at you randomly in VRChat, but something felt different about this person. It was as if they were somehow staring at me with intent. Despite moving to a different spot, it only took a few minutes for me to notice him again. This time he was standing on top of a staircase leading to a sky pool. I told my friend that he was there again, staring at me. She nodded and told me to switch to another instance. I didn’t hesitate. We thankfully didn’t spot him again for the rest of the night. It made it easier for me to shrug him off as a socially inept stranger.

The next day I got off work early and hopped on VRChat. None of my friends were online, so I decided to drive around solo in a car world depicting a lit up city at night. I put on one of my playlists – a mix of Eurobeat and techno – and started driving around, going as fast as I could without crashing.
As I was about to take the second corner on the track with a drift, I heard a faint sob. At first, I thought nothing of it. I could’ve imagined it, or misheard the tires skidding on the track. But then I heard it again, as I straightened out. I had definitely heard it right the first time. The world was playing a faint sob.
I shifted up a gear, and listened closely. Nothing. I finished the rest of the track and started a second lap. As I took the second corner again, I could’ve sworn I saw a bright white light glowing just beyond the track’s walls. I heard the sob again, except, this time it didn’t stop. I could hear it even as I went further down the track. It sounded as if someone was trying to silence their cries, causing them to inhale stutteringly and in short increments. I freaked out and went back to my home world before clearing my cache and exiting the game. At this point I connected the dots. I couldn’t believe it at first. I live in the real world. Ghosts aren’t real, but I couldn’t deny the fact that weird shit only started happening after I stumbled upon the horror world.

After deliberating for a while I eventually decided to go back to the world and see if it had any answers within it, but I was too freaked out to do it that day. I waited two days. During that time, none of my friends tried talking to me. I’ll admit, it hurt a little bit, but I managed. When I finished building up the courage I’d need to go back into the world, I put on my headset again, and booted up VRChat. I found the world in my “recently visited” tab, and stared at it. It felt dumb, but was there any other explanation?
A monotone world, a monotone man, and sobbing. Besides, what harm could any of it possibly do me?
It all took place in a game. A game I had been using to find people to hang out with. I chuckled softly, and joined the world, creating an invite-only instance as I did.

Upon spawning in I was greeted by the same sight I’d remembered. The crows cawed and flew across the path once again, from left to right. The wind was howling. I turned around and lo and behold, the table was there, note and all. I went up to it and re-read it, then I thought back to the first time I explored the world. “Did I light the candle?” The note had clearly told me to light the candle before moving. I facepalmed instinctively, accidentally hitting my headset with my controller as I did. I moved my hand toward the candle, I could interact with it. I clicked on it and the wick caught fire. I turned around and noticed something. This time, on a tree in the middle of the forking path, there was an old wooden sign covered in white lettering. I walked up to it. It read as follows: “Welcome, stranger. The answers you seek lie before you. Make the right choice.” I moved my hand closer to it and noticed I could interact with it. Upon doing so, the text changed. It now read: “A question will be asked at every step. Answer truthfully.”
I interacted with it again: “Have you been visited? Move right if so. Left if not.” What kind of ARG bullshit question was that? “Have I been visited?” By whom? I pondered for a moment. I guess so. I followed the path heading right. After walking for about 30 seconds the path became narrow and faded. I kept walking. After what felt like minutes, the path picked up again. The world had changed. The path took me to another fork in the road. This time, there was a worn out, rustic looking house in the middle. I could see through the gaps in between the planks that it was made of. The house only had one room. Inside of it was a warm light source, possibly another candle. I walked up to the door and paused. The note, it had said to “knock thrice.” I couldn’t interact with any part of the front of the house except for the door, which allowed me to open it. I made a fist with my hand and moved it toward the door, knocking on it three times. There was no way to tell if it had registered my knocking, as my hand moved through the wall. I stood there for a moment. I had knocked thrice, I guess I could open it? My thoughts were interrupted by the door suddenly swinging open on its own, revealing a dull interior. Inside the house was a dark closet, an old bed, a table not too different from the one at spawn, and a half-broken chair. A rope tied into a noose was hanging in the middle of the room. On the table was a note. “The path you’re heading down does not have a happy ending.”

I froze. Not because of the note, but because I thought I’d heard something. I listened intently.
I had definitely heard something; footsteps. Subtle, quiet footsteps. Slow, and determined. I looked back at the note and kept reading; “To the left lies salvation, to the right you’ll find answers.”
I thought back to the note at spawn. “Uncover the lies.” Was it referring to this note? The footsteps grew louder. The note in front of me said that salvation “lies” to the left, was this some kind of wordplay?
If so, I had uncovered the “lies”, but still had no idea which path was the correct one. The footsteps grew even louder and were accompanied by a noise. Soft sobbing. I exited the house. Though I heard whatever was heading my way, I couldn’t yet see it. I took a moment to decide which way to go. What was I actually seeking? Had it truly been answers, or to be free from whatever had followed me from this world? Would it still follow me if I picked answers over salvation? After another moment of deliberation I decided to head down the path leading to the right. I needed answers, not some kind of divine ritual to save me from a ghost in a game. As I walked down the path the footsteps and sobbing faded.

After roughly 30 seconds of walking, the path became narrow and faded once again. I kept walking.
The path faded even more and became crooked. Further up ahead, I could see the path disappearing completely, leaving only a gap in the trees for me to follow. I started wondering whether I had chosen the correct path, but my thoughts were cut short. The footsteps were growing louder again. I turned around.
In the distance, behind some trees, I saw him, walking toward me. The monotone man. He didn’t have an animation, he slid whilst standing in a neutral pose, his arms hanging down his sides, and his head. It was tracking me as he moved. I stood there for a moment, stunned. So it really had been a ghost. I turned back around and kept walking. After what felt like a few minutes, the trees opened up and gave way to a clearing, where light grey grass had begun sprouting up. In the middle of the clearing was a circular incline. A hole, or a pond perhaps? I went up to it. It was a pond. No. The pond. It was the pond I had found my friend in. Before he died, we had been drinking at my place. The last time I saw him alive was when he walked out the door after saying goodbye. I stared blankly, my eyes glassy. I missed him. I had gone for a walk the very next day, and found him there. In the clearing. Face-down in the pond. I could’ve stopped him, let him sleep over. If only I had… he wouldn’t have died. The footsteps grew louder, then stopped.
I could hear the sobbing behind me. I didn’t react. I kept staring. In the low quality reflection of the water, I could see the monotone man standing behind me. His hand on my shoulder. ‘I’m sorry.’ As I lifted my headset I could see a black, rectangular object rising from the pond. I had found the answer.

I sat up in my bed, resting my head against the backboard. I looked around for a moment before eventually fixing my gaze on the floor, and laid my arms on my legs. The wounds that had once covered them were now a faded purple, and somewhat grey, contrasting the fresh bright red scars that intersected and painted over many of the old ones. I couldn’t even feel the pain. Why couldn’t I feel the pain?
My headset rested exactly where I had put it seven days prior. On top of my drawer, across the room.
No one had even tried to talk to me. No one… I looked over at my sketchbook on my desk, the monotone man’s anguished expression staring back at me. I had drawn him standing in a VRChat world I often went to as a way to express myself. It was beautiful. So beautiful. The serenity of the scene helped me cope.
I was all alone. I only truly grasped this fact while I was sitting in the forest clearing one day. The world had been deleted five days ago, and I couldn’t find a reason to use VRChat again. I had no way to cope. This couldn’t go on any longer. My friendships were shallow at best. I placed my face in my hands, rubbing it, before standing up and sighing. I have to take control. I made coffee and sat down at my desk, methodically placing the knife I had taken with me to the left of the sketchbook. After staring at it for a moment, I picked up my pen and flipped to another page in my sketchbook. I pressed my pen down on the page. But I can’t let my potential go to waste. I began writing: “I started playing VRChat about two months ago.”

Credit: Sidewinder